26.12.05

155# One Year After...

155# One Year After...

26th of December. 365 days ago, the power of the nature brought away all the precious from the mankind's hands.

From the short film i saw in Astro, the scenes reminded me about the pain brought by the tsunami to the people. Nature is blind. It shows no mercy to anymore. Under the power of nature, everyone is the same, seems to be so weak and helpless. Regardless the race, the status, the wealth of a person, everyone is nothing, confronting the natural disasters.

People were losing their houses, their families, their propeties, their land. Their everything.
I hope i do not remind the sadness of the victims here. But i'm here to send my consolations to the victims survived from the disaster.



Present. The rain is out of control recently. The north is flooded. People are living pain.

2 days ago, Christmas Eve. It was raining heavily. I could not make to my friend's house due to the flood on the roads. A bus was stucked beside the drain because one of the wheel went into it.

10.40pm, i got a call from my friend. And i drove to his place regardless of the flood. I saw cars beside, and on the road. Down. I saw the bus stucked there. Helpless. I went to my friend's house, the flood bothered him too. But it was just a minor one.

1.40am, i drove back home. At the drain where a bus was stuck, i saw a second one. Another bus was stucked too. The water made the driver failed to locate the drain. I could not pass by there, i turned to the main road. I drove slowly due to the flood. Suddenly, the blue Satria car stopped in front of me, with hazard lights on, some white smokes coming from the exhaust. The car was down. Helpless.

There was no rain today, fortunately.

23.12.05

154# My...

154# My...


My Computer

Wednesday, 21st of December. At night, i turned on my desktop. A notification appeared on the screen. Telling me that i had altered the start up. To select back normal start up, can be selected again.

Windows XP users can have selective start up by clicking
Run > msconfig > Selective Start up > Able and Enable what programmes at your choice for start up.

But this is an advanced settings. My advice is, better not to change anything from there if you aren't an expert for computers.

I installed my HP Deskjet 3900, and i opened the msconfig to select out the HP guide thingy. From there onwards, my computer began to have problems. I'm not sure whether the problems occured were because the modifications i made in the start up. But i think it did concerned it.
For example, my computer had rebooted for a few times out of a sudden. I do not know why.


When i connected to the internet, it rebooted. The screen became black, then the system restarted. Got once i opened 2 IE browsers, and attempt to sign in my MSN messager. The system just hung. I forced to restart my computer. And when it restarted, an error detected shown. And it was "serious error".

I saved a DoTA game. I tried to load the game again. When the game was on loading, suddenly a "fatal error" warning appeared. It got to do with the ATI graphic card. I do not know what the Hell is wrong with my computer man!

Yesterday the sound from the modem was abnormal. For couple of times it did not sound normal when dialling up. After i restarted the computer twice then it appeared to be normal back.

Just now i analysed my C drive, disk defragment was needed. I was like, what the heck? The computer is just one week old, why the disk needed to be defragmented? The D drive, where i stored my documents with didn't need that instead. Therefore, i defragmented the C drive. Hope everything is fine after i did that.

Now i'm typing this, the computer seems to be normal. It doesn't reboot nor get hang or something. Everything is fine. I think if i do not load my saved DoTA, then it would not have any problem then.

Oh God, this is a new computer. Please don't torture me in such a way. I can't live without computer. Average this computer is operating at least 6 hours per day. 3 users, my younger sisters and me.


My Car

My car has 5 tyres. Why 5? One more is the spared one, of cause. And 4 out of the 5 had punctured before. That was kind of pissing off. Imagine when you are on a rush, on the way of driving your steering got out of controlled. That is dangerous and fatal right...
Now, the car tyres and radiator cooler are fixed - done. No problem will arise at least for this short moment. I hope the "short moment" would be counted in years...


Regardless the problems i mentioned above, i just like my car. Not only it's driver friendly for tall drivers like me, and it's audio system. I like the car's front and back bumpers. And the rubber proctection at the sides of the car.

There was a red Iswara banged at my front when it went reverse. I sirened but it was too late. That car was slightly spoilt, and my front bumper was slightly damaged too. The flat part of it was dent in. That happened in the worst mall on earth, the parking area of The Store Center Point at Klang.

The other case. Same venue as above. I told you it's a worst mall on earth. Any bad things could happen. I was making a turn at the parking area. There were cars parked at the point where turnings are made. Those god damned drivers just never bother people who need to turn their vehicles to pass by there. Therefore, i tried to avoid the cars over there. I didn't notice the pillar at all, and the left hand side of my car scratched onto the pillar. If i say "bang" would be to much. But the impact was kind of big too as i felt i got banged or something.

After i damned the cars which blocked my way. I went down to check my car. Zero damage. The rubber at the side of the car had some white paint on it, from the pillar. I swept away the paint. The rubber did not have a single scratch on it at all. Good. Then i drove off and continued to damn those drivers who parked the cars over there.

Today, at Klang, again. After i fetched my sister from the tuition centre. I drove as usual. Relaxed, listening to the 7th album of Korn that i bought on Wednesday. I stopped my car when the cars in front of me stopped (of Cause). Steadily i stopped.

I remembered that i did not braked out of a sudden. But after 1.5 seconds i stopped, i felt an impact from the back of my car.

"What are we going to do?" My sister asked.
"That guy's car is definitely gone." I had never afraid of my car at all, you know why.

I turned on my hazard light, went down to check, "as usual", indeed.

The Nissan Sentra, BFF 9**9, did not stopped on time, therefore... It wasn't my fault. So the driver did not sound at me or something. This kind-fat-chinese guy admitted his fault that he did not noticed my brake lights and stop his car. His car crashed onto my car's back bumper. Precisely at the point of the bumper where trailer towings are made. The hardest point of the structure of the bumper, i guess.

The Sentra's front intercooler's cover gone. The car's number plate gone. My car, zero damage. I was just too lucky.

I am not a good driver nor an ethical one. It's better not to mention about free from accidents. Superstitious purposes. I think i'm one of those superstitous people...

I got a friend who drives a Waja met an accident. Couples of fractures at her chest bone. That was serious. Her car's engine and radiator gone. She was driving at the highway. That explains the impulse during the crash. I hope she is fine by now...


My 7th Korn Album

I spotted the album in Fantasy shop, Sunway Pyramid. After the disappoinment of having no japanese albums or DVD to buy, finally i found something else i needed to buy. Korn's "See you on the other side" album. But after i saw the imported version, i put back the local version.

The local version was just about RM43.50, but the Eupore imported one was RM63.50. Big difference. Imported version comes with 3 unrealesed studio tracks, 2 remixes, and 2 videos. It also gives one year Korn official fan club membership, with personal homepage, blog, priority for pre-sale tickets, medias...


Those do not bother me. I'm not staying in the US. But the imported version is in custom package. Quite nice. But i think the songs itselves are more important.

After i dropped the CD i bought into the car, i continued to woalk around in the mall.

When i passed by Video Ezy shop. I recalled that Korn should have posters for propaganda purposes. I went back to the shop and requested for a poster. Though the album itself did not come with one. The lady search in the counter. The lady boss said there's no free poster for the album. I gave a disappointed expression and walked to check out the anime soundtracks.

I could see that there was another young lady walked into the store, and she took a cylinder object out. A roll of posters, my guess was correct. She took out one piece from it, and rolled it. I pretended not to see it and continued to see at those soundtracks. The lady at the counter came to me and said, "This is your poster.". And the young lady rolled it and handed it to me.

I was thinking... They should not give it to customers right? Or else they would not do it when their boss was not watching. They already said no posters, but there was one for me in the end. Those two ladies were so kind! They gave me the poster! Guys, go support them by buying CDs from them. Call their boss to increase their salaries! But the boss was kind of selfish, said there were no Korn posters... Or she just did not know actually there were? Mmmm...


My friends

Wei-Jin and Tai Ken are back from the UK. Actually Jin called me out to DoTA all night in SS15 yesterday. I did not make it. It was just a rough plan. I had something on yesterday, or else i would appear in SS15 and call him out to DoTA until the next morning.

I slept until 12pm something until the call woke me up. I took about 12 seconds to figure out who was on the line. It was our pretty brilliant friend who is in the LSE. She is not coming back this time. She didn't know that the others were coming back. So she is kind of bored to stay over there in such a cool weather. Or she likes the weather? Mmmm...

I miss you guys. I will go to find y'all when i'm free alright. Please don't go back to UK so early! I need to be a house guard until 2nd of 2006. My parents are going overseas for vacation. I'm not. I need to fetch my sister to tuition. So sad. I'm not going out for Christmas and New Year this year. Sad case...


My outro

9kb notepad file for this entry. I guess you're tired of reading all of this. So sorry. I just have so many useless things to tell over here. My posts appeared to me randon nowdays. But i have tonnes of serious posts to come with. Give me some time. I shall give you some bombastic stuffs to read... If i could make it...

20.12.05

I've been tagged!

I've been tagged! By Princess Kim Cyndi

1986 - 19 years ago
August 21th

General Hospital, Klang
Brought to life

1991 - 14 years ago (5 years old)
Fast learner in drawings, left handed

Addicted in drawing non sense
Young and addicted

1995 - 10 years ago (9 years old)
SRJKC Pandamaran B

Getting awards for drawing contest, and academic acheivements
But did not getting anything for sports, sigh
Abused my right arm because of B that i got - non sense

1999 - 6 years ago (13 years old)
SMK Kampung Jawa

Sucks, everything
The school itself, the students, the teachers. the enviroment
Stucked in between the life of studying and involving in gangs

2002- 3 years ago (16 years old)
SMK Kampung Jawa, continued

Started to concentrate in studies,
Since gang friends stopped studying and began to work.
Started tuition life in Delta Tuition Centre.
Being a tall, silent freak in the tuition centre

2004 - 1 year ago (18 years old)
Taylor's College, Cambridge A-Levels.
PM8

Biology, Physics, Chemistry, Maths
Ultimate way of mental suicide
Physical and mental condition minimum
Supported by music and faith

2006 - next year (20 years old)
Studying in IMU

Killing and being killed by studies
On the way to achieve my dream
to be a licienced killer

2015 - 10 years from now (29 years old)
Working in a GH

Getting experiences
Further studies for master
Psychiatry
Hope to have another half, sigh

I tag:
Adrien

She Fong
Audrey

Those who kena better be prepared and faster go and type ok!
Have a nice day!

18.12.05

153# Korn Talk

153# Korn Talk

Once i finished the previous entry, i thought of to write something about Korn over here.
I was glad to see Channel V's The Rockshow to show videos from Korn for the whole one hour programme.


Back to year 2002, Korn is the first Metal band i listen to. To be precise, it's a Nu-Metal, and Thrash Metal band.

Their songs are mainly based on the vocalist's child abuse, broken family background, and the problems he encountered. I learnt a lot of things from this band. Regardless what i learnt are postive or negative, i just feel that this band really brought me a lot of things that i can't learn from school's text books.

I learnt bad words, of cause. Like i mentioned before, words like Queer, C*nt, P*rn, S*lt, C*it... Alright, that's too bad to list down.

I learnt about guitars. The reason why i picked up guitars is because i listened to Korn. When i bought my guitar, only i noticed that Korn are actually using Ibanez too, for the past 14 years. But i play 6 strings, they play 7 strings. Which are the K7 series, their custom made.

There were 2 guitarist, Head and Munky. I prefer Head because i liked his different kind of dreadlock. But now, he left the bad.

I was shocked to know the annoncement from their website, which Head left the band and choosed "Jesus Christ to be his saviour". I didn't know what it means and i asked Sexy Teng.
From Wikipedia, i found Head's official page after he left Korn. He is going solo after he is being baptisted. I didn't know that he dislike what he was playing and singing for Korn.


He felt stressed after his divorce with his wife. And he couldn't accept the truth that his daughter was singing the band's song, A.D.I.D.A.S., which stands for 'All Day I Dream About Sex". Imagine a 5,6 years old girl sings this in front of you. And to overcome his addiction of drug, Crystal Meth, he asked God to save him. In the end, he got saved. And he choosed to leave the band and going to something sacred.

I was absolutely gone off. A guy who influence me to play guitar left his band! What a sad news for me... Now Korn is 4 piece. They are not going to have a replacement for the second guitarist according to them.

Recently, TV is playing their lastest video clip, titled "Twisted Transistor". For your information, Korn is not black ok! If you have watched that video at the TV, i want to tell you guys, those black are not them! They are the hiphoppers. I don't know to spell it... what sloop dog, xhibit, blah blah... The end part of the video, where got a few guys sitting and discussing with the hip hoppers, those are real members of Korn.

The video is mainly about Korn wants MTV to play their songs. So they are making their video to be acceptable and mainstream by the public. The last part of the video, where the vocalist Jonathan Davis said:

"What is this? Rock is dead. I want some bling bling, i want some girls who are booty shakin'. Comon' give me something."

Jonathan Davis is implying the hip hop is dominating. Though he said Rock is dead, that was a lie. In their Greastest Hit album, they believe that rock is not dead.

This is the first video from them since Head left the band. And to be truth, this song sucks for me. It's an experimental album, because they have change their stlye since Head left. And the video itself also sucks! Are they going to critique the music scence? I don't know man.

TV was playing their video titled "Word Up" and "Another Brick from the Wall". Those are not their songs too, those are cover songs. Their songs are rather dark and depressing. Which you only able to see in The Rockshow or something at night.

Rock is not dead. And i want to say, Black hip hop sucks! It's not everything ok!

152# There's something about DoTA

152# There's something about DoTA

I'm back. There's been a while since the last time i blogged.

This's the first time i blog using this desktop. Been used to type with the laptop, now i feel so uneasly to type with desktop'skeyboard...

Actually i wanted to blog something out here days ago. But this CPU is installed with DoTA, you know. Warcraft 3 - Defeat of the ancients. (In case someone don't know.. But i think everyone knows DoTA right?)

Therefore i spent quite long time to play the game. I seriously suck in playing this. For so many times i'd played, i got once with 1 kill, once with 2 kills. The 2 kills game i was using some tricky invisible character. (Rikimaru la) Or else i would not get any kills at all. Back to college time, when i knew nothing about the game, i always got killed (bullied) by my mates.

Even Justin, who supposed to show some mercy to a slow learner like me also stabbed me like Hell. Justin, damn bad la you! But right now i still suck in playing it, even though i used cheats! Damn...

And i can't play battlenet, because i don't have the official licience key thingy. So sorry Jin!

Ok, enough of DoTA talks. Let's proceed to something else.

Since the day i got this CPU from my cousin, average i spent about 3 to 4 hours in front of the monitor. It was quite hurting as my eyes feel dry and painful. Back to the times where i spent 4 hours daily with the laptop, i did not have any problem with it...

In order to transfer my files at the laptop to this CPU, purposely i went to get myself a USB flash drive. I don't want to use my sister ones... I was buying it at one of the shop in The Store Shaw Centrepoint. RM79 for Toshiba's 256Mb. Tried to kill down the price but couldn't. The salesman was kind of tough to kill. Then the other salesman got me. It was my secondary schoolmate. Well, old friend price. I manage to get it with RM75. Actually the price is quite ok, but i just wanted to kill as low as possible. However, seems that i'm weak in killing prices. Girls usually do well in this sort of thing...

I deleted all my files in the laptop. I missed out to transfer pictures taken from college... Those pictures which i got from Jin, Audrey, Layhui... All gone. But i can still go to their friendster profile to grab it again. And from my photobucket... Though it are not in original resolutions anymore. Whatever.

I feel a little bit guilty now, as i am simply crap around here. Because i can't wait to finish this, so that i could go to read rojaks' blog. Tell you guys, this blog is a must-read. The posts by this guy (i think it should be a guy) called Wingz are damn funny. Go read it guys! I get to know this blog through Adrien, where he posted a BSB video directed from rojak's at his blog before.

Singles to buy:
1. Mika Nakashima - Glamorous Sky - Released long time ago
2. Mika Nakahsima - Oborodukiyo Inori - Released damn long time ago

Albums to buy:
1. Ai Otsuka - Love Cook - Released 14th Dec
2. Korn - See you on the other side - Released 6th Dec

DVDs to buy:
1. Ai Otsuka live - Released August
2. Mika Nakashima - BEST - Releasing 24th Dec
3. Slipknot - 9.0 Live - Released Nov

I just noticed that Adrien listens to a lot of japanese artists' songs. How come huh? Are those singers sing songs for the animes? Mmm... I thought i was the only japanese influenced guy, but in fact i wasn't. Adrien and Jin listen to japanese songs too...

15.12.05

151# I'm in

151# I'm in

One - Offer of Admission

Yes, I'm in. Thank God.

When i was watching "Blue Streak" starred Martin Lawrence at the Star Movie channel, i heard the siren from the postman in front of the gates. He asked for a familiar name. Yes, my name was heard. He handed me a big envelope, asked for a signature.

And i saw IMU's logo on the top left of the envelope. Swiftly i signed it and gave it to the postman. Then he gave it to me after he teared the whatever-thing out from it.

With the speed of light i moved into house and teared the envelope. I did not see any keywords such as "accepted" nor "rejected", as i could imagine to see. After i read it, and tried to understand what the letter about, i came out with a conclusion. Yes, i'm in.

"Offer of Admission" titled. Means i'm accepted right? Enclosed with policy on payment of fees and proforma invoice, asking for money already. I think i had read it very clearly. I'm in.

With the speed of light again as to share the joy, i sms-ed my friends to tell them the mercy gave from IMU. Sms-ed Her first, of cause. Then my closest buddy, then the others...

Thanks, all you guys out there.. For all the supports, words and blessings. Now i won't complain with you all about my future studies. You guys are in peace now. Haha...

Career as a doctor is my dream. When i had just overcame the fear of being rejected, i need to consider about the stress that i would face later.

Today, 15th is my sister's last day for her final exam, in the first phase, pre-clinical years. I can see that she is stressed enough for this course. But i'm stepping onto what she is suffering now.

I was not really encouraged to study medicine. My dad wanted me to take up business, or building engineering. So that he could pass his business and companies to me in the future. I'm the only son. But i can't do it. I'm a man of science instead of anything else. Though i'm not as smart as my sister does, and for sure i would face more problems and stress in the future during the course. However, if i did not study this and work as a doctor, that is really living in Hell.


Two - Punctured tyre


Promised my friend to treat him a piece of roti canai. I was about to drive my car out around 11.45pm. I checked my car tyre, one of it seemed out of gas. But i thought it could last until tomorrow.

I drove it out. Less than a minute, i felt some strange problem from the car. I knew what went wrong. I managed to find a place for me to stop the car and went down to check it out.

Damn! The tyre was totally punctured. Luckily i was still near to my house. I drove back. With extreme concentration. The car was totally out of my control as it tended to move towards the right, where the tyre was punctured.

I survived reaching home. Luckily there was not many cars on the road because it was kind of late. I afraid the tyre is damaged because i drove it for some distance under such a condition.

Again, tomorrow i'm going to change it, then send it to the tyre shop. Call them to check for the other 4 as well. I have enough of tyre problems...

Actually before i went out, a sudden thought flashed through my mind. I knew if i went out this late it would be dangerous. Because a friend of mine of robbed and chopped on his face last year. So i was afraid of being robbed or something. I took out my credit card and bank card from my wallet. Left my IC, driving licience, cash less than RM200. That would be safer than. But still, bad things occured. Fortunately it was just a tyre problem, and nothing worse happened. Thank God again...


Three - Central Processor Unit


I'm getting a new CPU tomorrow. My desktop life shall begin then. My sister needs to bring this laptop to seremban for her clinical year in IMU. Finally i convinced my dad to change a new CPU. The old one was AMD 150Mhz, 20Gb. The processor slow because of unknown problems. The standard BIOS battery dried. The CPU is just simply a headache cause.

A new piece, from my cousin. With the price of 1.8k. Pentium 4 3.0Ghz, MSI 7071 Motherboard, 128Mb ATI graphic card, 256Mb DDR, 80Gb HDD, DVDRW, Built in network card... A cutting edge CPU for me, should be enough for a semi hardcore computer user like me. The saddest thing is still, no broadband available in my area. Or else, it would turn into perfect.

I found out a very convenient donwload software, called "Flashget". It's not a sharing tool i guess. When you found something to download from a page, regardless what page is it. Megaupload, usendit, blah blah...

To download the file, it doesn't go through the server's control. So it's not counted in the total download. Although a particular file has exceeded the download limit or period, with that flashget, it can be downloaded still. And download process can be continued after re-connections. Damn cool right? Go get one.


Four - Firefox incompatiblity


Yesterday, or the day before i was tortured by the HTMLs in my blog's template. Firefox users are complaining for the blog's incompatiblity to firefox browser. I knew, Su Ann told me this before. But i just can't get rid of this problem. I managed to find out what was wrong in the skin's template.

It was the part of both of the blog boxes. HTML line "overflow: auto;". If i remove this line from both blog boxes and both scroll bars' code. Then the blog boxes can be read. Just that the scroll be become cacat-ed, and the dates gone out of place. Still can't be solved. I tried for an hour for it.

So, i'm expecting help from people out there. Edit my template so that it can be viewed using Firefox browser. Not much people are using IE now, as i could see. But i'm still an IE user, because MSN toolbar allows tags in a browser too.

I guess i'm not going to change a new skin. I like this blog skin a lot and i have used it more than a year. It's very convenient and nice-to-look-at for me. Blog skins nowadays really turn me down.

Therefore, Firefoz users... Please tolerant with my HTML stupidity. Try to use IE when you need to browse my site alright? Thanks a lot for being considerate...

It's already 1.16am now. This is the first time i blog during such a late night. Once i came back from mamak then already i started to blog.

10.12.05

150# I know myself

150# I know myself

Saw this from Audrey's blog. And i tried the quiz. It's pretty accurate though.
Click on this if you want.


Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.


The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

9.12.05

149# New Old Stuffs

149# New Old Stuffs

These are my works when i was in Form 2 until Form 4. I used to draw a lot of Samurai X. I learnt a few of techniques from this author. It's really cool enough for me.









And the King of Fighters, Hong Kong style...




These are the funny ones! I hated this teacher a lot so i drew these.


I've shown the blue one to my PM8 classmates, Vivien liked this a lot and asked me to send to her.


I got a few sketches pending for redrawing in ink version. But feel very lazy to do it as i do not think these worth to spend my time with...




And this is the one which i spent for a whole day, but i still could not come out with a satisfying ink version of it...



Anyway i like this piece, though.

My dad came into my room just now and starred at my pictures which i sticked on my wall. I thought that he would going to comment of those evil erotic ones. Instead, he asked which pieces are the lastest ones. Then i showed him the new ones in my clear holder. I know he already notice those erotic pieces i'd drawn. Luckily he did not say anything la.

He ended with "Good work, draw more when you're free."

Oh my God! He agrees me to draw!

148# Art Talk

148# Art Talk

As the years go on, not only the music scene had split into new skool, and old skool. My opinion, even drawings itself also split into two genres.

The traditional drawings are done by pencil, pen, ruler, curve rulers, and other simple stationaries and tools. Drawings are in black and white. Simple modifications can be done by Microsoft Paint as to add some air brush effects. And Microsoft Photo editor can be used to arrange the drawings' margins.

Right now, with the development of softwares, computer helps a lot. The new skool type of drawings rely a lot, or even fully on computer hardwares and softwares. Hardwares are such as drawing pad, and the pen. Softwares are such as Adobe Photo Editor, and some other softwares which i do not know to name. It's not my field...

From the influence of mangas from the japanese, nowadays people are fully relying on computers to do their drawings, instead of creating it by the traditional ways. They do not really concentrate on the overall structure of the picture, but what mean manner for them are those effects they used.

Colour effects, shading effects, hair colour effects... All can be done by computer with just a simple click. Effortlessly, a beautiful art piece can be done. And most of the people nowadays prefer computer generated drawings then pure hand drawn drawings.
Examples from Kaorumorite
1. 2.

Graphics pictures are done simply by taking a photo, and edit it...
Example from Stormchild
Example from Ikko

As a purist of hand drawings, i think hand drawings do have more art values then those computer drawn ones. The life can't be sent to the drawings by the computers. But the direct hand drawing could.

I do not understand why people would say a computer drawing is nice, even though the drawing itself sucks. What meant nice was just the effect used for the drawing. It's really disappointing me. People are loving computer effects.

For more than a few times people posted their works on the internet. I read the comments, all of them said those are very nice. It drove my curiousity to check them out. I thought i would able to see something astonishing. But what i saw were just disappointments. The drawings all... I guess that my youngest sister could even draw better than those even when she was just 10. However, i do admit that they could really make use of the computer effects to make their drawing to be nice.

However, i've seen some black and white ones. But still...
Example from Endoresu.
Example from raggedoll.
Example from Stormchild.

The era of black and white traditional drawings is over. Now the computer drawings are dominating. It's really a sad phenomenon for me. I remembered i saw a lot of professional level drawings from the comic magazine posted by readers. If was when i was about 12 to 14... But now, all drawings suck. I wonder where do all those professional in drawing readers have been...

The only person that i knew, who is still have the possesion of traditional drawings is Ying ying, my ex CAL classmate. She drew a lot of LOTR, and it were really cool. She got some influence from me too, and she had drew one work which was quite depressing, titled "Dust". I can't publish her work her without her permission. But it's a really good piece of work.

8.12.05

147# IMU result 15/12

147# IMU result 15/12

Finally i had completed the final part of the story in
Decarboxylated. If Adrien did not remind me about it, guess i won't be told to continue my narrations... I felt quite sad to end the story. Actually the story has not end yet. But i'm ending the part of a particular character's history. And i found the story is inspiring. Once again, it's not my original story, but it's from Inoue Takehiko. I'm just put it into words with some modifications, just to share it.

And
Benacom is left behind for quite sometime. Even Viven herself has not write yet. And i need some ideas to come out with some new stuffs for it...

Feel so bored recently. To be exact, i feel bored everyday! I'm jobless since the October until now. Even
Audrey, who has just begin her holiday for few days also cannot tahan being jobless at home. I'm even worse la ok... Third month liao being jobless at home...

Today is Thursday, once again. The latest movie i have watched as AEON FLUX. The storyline was just as usual. But i found the female character was damn cool. Her figure, he movements, he facial expressions, her costume, her voice... one word, COOL!!

Yesterday night i was looking for mamak friends, again... It was 11pm, and no one was free. Some of them busy, some of them not picking up the calls, some of them refuse to go out... And even one of them was at her boy friend's place, waiting to go to watch Zahura's premier show... Alamak.

In the end... I mamak all alone. Eating at the mamak alone at the table of 4. Luckily i still had this friend who was still over the phone, continued to sms chat with me. Since 8pm we started, and until 12am we ended. Multi task again. Eating, sms, watching football at once. Or bungkus waffle, sms at the same time. Or drive with 60kmph at small road and read sms at the same time... Multi tasking is fun, but danger...

Very sian la... My buddy went pangkor for school vacation. I am left all alone at Klang.

IMU interview result is coming out on 15 DEC. According to Mei Wen, a few of her friends already got offered by the IMU though the official result is not out yet. Sure those people are those "must grab" for the IMU... One more week to 15 Dec... patient... But i always have nightmares for it, sigh...

Jin is coming back on 19 dec, and i got a friend is going to Korea for vacation at the same day as well. One is leaving one is coming back... what la...

Quite fed up in drawing. 2 days ago i spent the whole day drawing the same picture again and again. What came out from my hand were not satisfying. And i redrew for more than 5 times. Two 2B pencils wasted, curve rulers damaged, Pilot pens damaged, mentally damaged, mood destroyed, inpirations gone. What left were just frustrations... Damn it!!

I'm just crapping over here. Nothing else better to do. How wish i could study now like all of you all...

3.12.05

146# I'm done

146# I'm done

I don't know how shall i begin...

Physically, mentally. I'm done.

If IMU rejects my application. I give up in studying medicine. I give up in pursuing my dream as a doctor. I give up in my future which i wanted.

From deep inside i understand. Medicine does not meant for me to study with. According to my academic results, it is really hard for a medical university to accept me.

Even though i have 1000 reasons which i want to study medicine, i want to be a doctor in the future. But i have one fact which enough to cancel off all those 1000 reasons that i have.

My mind would like to study medicine. But my body can't take the pressure. For those who were close to me, you know. For the pass 1.5 years in taylors, how did i suffered. Anorexia. I could not eat. Once i did, everything threw out.

Before i could go to have meals with my collegemates, the first thing i needed to do was to puke in the toilet. Before i could go sit for any exam papers during the AS, the first thing i needed to do was to puke in the toilet.

After my meals, regardless what i had eaten, i puke beside the road, into the drains. After my exam papers during the AS, if i did not do well, i puke in the toilet.

My oesofagus is meant to swallow, not the other way round. This health problem had disturbed me for more than a year. When i spat, my phlegm was accompanied by some black substances, which i suspected it as a dried blood. And occasionally i spat out red blood together with my phlegm.

My body is not afford to suffer all of these. I am weak in handling pressures. Even though i feel relieved when listen to music, play the guitar, or do sports. But mentally the stress within is irremoveable. And i did not recover from these though i went for the doctors and took pills.

I was adviced to increase the intake of vitamin B by taking oral pills, by my sister. But the outcome was not noticable. Memorizings during studies need high amount of Vitamin B. And lacking of this vitamin causes one's stress.

There are reasons why sometimes i remain silent. There are reasons why sometimes i get mad out of sudden. There are reasons why i would become so violet. There are reasons why i got such a results in my A levels.

For more than a few times i was about to give up A levels. But the burdens of my future, and the name of the family stopped me more than once from slitting my wrists.

If God sees this, why did not He take these away from me?

I don't think that medicine really suits me. Although i really like it, but to overcome the first 5 years of MBBS is an important thing i need to consider before i could reach my goal as a doctor. I doubt my ability to overcome it. Even though me myself could, but my body not necessary would.

145# Presents from the poison-hearted

145# Presents from the poison-hearted

I did not know that she doesn't like me to be with her.
I did not know how she thinks about me.
I apologize to her because i cared,
not because i like to say sorry for nothing.

She ignored.
Her emotions are beyond my comprehensions.
She knows what she supposed and what she is not supposed to do.
Her eyes are blindfolded, and she walks on the barbed-wire.
She doesn't care.
Her ignorance is dominated by the fog.

My pride injured.
My time is gone.
My hands are empty.
My heart is poisoned.

She was not meant to be the one that i wanted.
So devious, so glamorous.

While i am just a person who came from nothing.
Tried to grasp everything.

I wondered,
how would it feel like,
For her,
To be me.

" Listen, listen to me, listen.
When nobody's in your heart now,

Let me intrude it from the crowd,
Please let me stay for a while.
Stay, stay in me for these empty hands i gave in..."


1.12.05

144# Stimuli

144# Stimuli

Visual Stimulant
I bought Dan Brown's collection today from the MPH. I took the Popular Card from my sister since i planned to buy Angel and Demons from there. But luckily i did not buy at popular, you will know why then. I'm looking for the UK version, but popular is selling the US one.

I found UK Da Vinci's Code in the MPH, as well as Angels and Demons. Deception Point, Digital Fortress looked interesting. So i bought the whole set from the MPH with price 20 pounds. Individual book is 6.99 pounds, so i bought the whole set, i considered saved a little bit...

Somehow actually they sell those individual books with the price RM34.90, cheaper than the direct converted price. Even the US versions' prices are also around RM34.90. But US versions are not as thick as the UK ones. Why huh?

Once i paid for those books, i walked out from the MPH. Placed my hand into my left pocket. And i found out that the card my sister gave me was actually Jusco card, instead of Popular card.

Luckily i did not buy those in the popular shop. Or else i'll be damn malu in front of the counter, with no discount for my
purchases some more.

I started Angel and Demons first among the 4 books despite the fact that it's the longest story. I've read until 10% of the story. Not too bad, religion, physics theories are involved. The storyline makes me can't stop from reading.

Actually i'm new in reading novels. The first novel i read was the book "Death Cults" borrowed from my friend. Murder cases for cults based on true incidents. I like the west end female lesbian vampires the most and i read it twice, haha.

Oral Stimulant
I bought a new kind of sundae, RM3.50 and a double Fillet-O-Fish burger from the McD. And both costed me RM10.XX. I was like, WTF? An extra piece of fish in the fish burger is costed RM7.00? Robbery ah? I asked the cashier about the Ala-Carte price of that burger since it's not shown anywhere in the list. She did not know either. She gave me the receipt. I read, HS!! RM6.65 for that bloody burger! I could even buy a set of value meal already! Damn it!!


Audio Stimulant
Recently i'm interested in this Germany Gothic Metal Band called "Leaves' Eyes". Unlike the usual Metal bands, this band's vocalist is a female, Liv Kristine Espenaes Krull. I get to know this band because this vocalist appeared for the song Nymphetamine with the band "Cradle of Filth" which i'm listening to.

According to the songs that i have downloaded for pre-listening, their songs are in english. But i went to their page before and it was in German, i thought they sing in German? But now they have both German and English language to be choosed in their page now. I just found out that.

Anyway, they practicing the Gothic style. With sorrow vocals, keyboards, violin, minor keys, but less tremolo pickings.

Somehow, overall i don't feel terrorized by the songs which usually a Gothic song does. It's something like Evanescene, but the non mainstream, non commercial type of it. And sometimes i feel it like Celine Dion or Madonna... So people, you should try to listen for this band k...


Mental Stimulant
PC fair strikes KLCC convention centre again, from 2nd until 4th of December. Bloody Hell, i want to go to get an audio player for myself. I think i'm going, if i manage to drag my friends here out. Guess i can't call Aretha, Cyndi out although promised to meet up in KLCC. Because geek stuffs are not interested by the girls (?). Wait for Wei-Jin to come back first...

I read the newspaper, saying that video player, literally MP4 is available with the price of RM300, over there. WTF?

Serious or not wei... RM300 can't buy nuts, not even a usable MP3. What about MP4, ridiculous. It is possible for an MP4 to come out with that price, if the product itself is China Mari ones. Then RM300 seems to make some senses.

I saw Apple's iPOD video, in a com shop at Bukit Raja. 20Gb, RM 1,599.00... Walao-eh... With that price i can already buy palm la brader... But anyway this device, iPOD video looks cool, and the capacity of 20Gb make possible to stuff in MPEG movies in it. And the iPOD Nano is selling for RM95X.00. Expensive too la...

I already spent for more than RM200 this week for buying a score book and Dan Brown. So i need to control myself from throwing money into the river. Since i'm being a jobless person at home, i have no reason for myself to spend so much of money.

But stuffs in the PC fair is tempting me to bring them home! Remember the previous PC fair i went during the last day. Samsung MP3, 256Mb was sold with RM199.00 only! So usually last day they will sell with a lower price, in order to compete with the other stalls, and to clean their old stocks as well. I guess...?

Die lo... I really want a HDD based MP3 or MP4 player. My 3 years old CD walkman can be displayed in the museum now. My dream ones, 20Gb, usually will cost me more than RM800... So... I don't think i can come out with that amount of money man.

Prices of these tech stuffs will drop drastically, even faster than my blood glucose level. I guess i should just be patient, buy those next time...

But i'm giving myself so many "Next time"s. So when is the "time" for me to buy it?

Give me money la.

30.11.05

143# Random 21

143# Random 21

0. I got a few things to blog with which are not related to each another, so i came out with this random entry.

1. I feel that even my closest friends will insult me, make fun of me without any care. I was pissed off today.

2. I feel that i do not belong to any group. Neither the group over Klang here, nor the group like in the college.

3. I am anxious about my application to IMU.

4. I will not enter Kolej University Pengurusan Teknologi Msia for any reasons. - All malays uni.

5. I might study biotech+biomedic double degree at Monash uni if i can't enter IMU or i give up in studying medicine.

6. I recalled the medicine's name - Gambutrol, and the 6 demons' name - Cain, Nero, Judas, Legion, Belial, Lucifer in Emily.

7. I watched Emily for the second time yesterday.

8. I watched kungfu Mahjong 2 as well yesterday, it's funny. Those who can play mahjong would understand better.

9. I noticed that almost all girls eat faster than i do.

10. I still can't find any work or course to work with though it's already December.

11. I still hate the politics of our country - the hatred is increasing proportionally day by day.

12. I played 3 songs, about 25 minutes in afternoon violently, and i could not hold the chopstick properly after that.

13. I called my friend who only free on Wed to mamak, but she was lining up for Roller Coaster in Genting Highlands that time.

14. I found out a few of famous blogs recently. I conclude that famous blogs are usually with improper eng, obscence topics.

15. I found out a friend of mine in coll separated with her bf yesterday.

16. I am waiting to watch The Fog, HP4, and Aeon Flux. Anyone?

17. I am waiting the chance for me to get a new desktop.

18. I think i need to wash my car.

19. I got a few things that i can't tell when some particular people asked. Because i respect their beliefs.

20. I got a few things needed to tell to someone, but i think it's better to tell after i settled my uni applications.

21. I actually stopped at 12. just now to remove my facial masque, clean my face and put on the moisturiser. Don't laugh k.

29.11.05

142# Licienced and Royal Unwasheds

142# Licienced and Royal Unwasheds

For you all who are settled in the UK, Dublin and Germany, you guys might not know about the lastest hotest news in Msia now.

Don't know since when the policemen in the country came out with an equation,
China Mari = Prostitutes
Those who think it in this way is definitely a whore.

For than a few of cases where China women who came to Msia, complaint to the authorities that they had been maltreated by the police department. They were molested, forced to do insulting movements, violently hurt, and even sexually harassed.

People got abused by policemen. Where are they going to complain? Back to the police station? The policemen will even treat them "better" then.

Obviously those so-called polices were already doing things which out of the limit. If a person is suspected to have drugs in her body, policeman cannot do the searchings. But instead, a doctor is the one who doing it. The police department claimed

that for all the actions they took, they were mainly to search for drugs or whatever things from those suspects. Is this reason acceptable?

The recent case in the town is the leak of cellphone captured short clip of a naked china women being maltreated by an Islamic police women. From the clip, shown a back of a chinese women. The women was forced to pinch her ears and do stand

ups. Without a piece of cloth with her during the entirely process. And in front of her there was a Malay police women. After the so-called "Examination" or literally, maltreatment, and then the women was allowed to dressed up at last. None of them noticed that they were being captured.

Since the clip is leaked out and shared by everyone, it started to get attention from the public. This is just one of those

cases where China women got arrested and maltreated by policemen, and the government is trying to back the problem up by their very own solutions.

According to the papers, i'm not really sure whether the police women who abused her authority found guilty or not, but she is released. And what the government even concern is, who the Hell is the one who captured the clip.

Let's put it this way... They are not going to bother what is wrong with their men's diciplines and works. But instead, they are even more concern about who captured that incident happened in the police station.

Thus, it's something like, they are going to find who spread their shameful acts, and they are going to kick the person's ass. And for your infomation, they even set a group, which will do further investigations on finding the cameraman.

Lalala... Hey, he is the man. Before he could settle the diplomatic tension between the two countries, he ordered the "Sentinels" to go the "search-and-destroy" job.

When shall racial discriminations and unfairness disappear in everyone's vision? It's damn impossible to attain what the so-called 2020. What we need is just total fairness, not the theory of look-at-where-you-are-standing-you-gonna-fuckin-listen-to-me.

Damned master, train damned dogs.

27.11.05

141# Metal for Dummies

141# Metal for Dummies

(Edited)
I found this page, a list of
heavy metal genres. And i found the exact way to explain what am i listening to right now.

Black metal -- Considered to be an extreme sub-genre of metal. The genre has its origins in early thrash/speed metal and is often (but not always) characterised by Satanic or occult lyrical themes, usually 'screamed' or rasped (lower pitched and high-pitched alike) out rather than sung. Venom and Bathory are credited with pioneering the genre. Other notable black metal artists include Burzum, Darkthrone, Immortal, Emperor and Mayhem. There are also further sub-categories such as national socialist black metal and Tolkien metal.

Gothic metal -- A fusion of the bleak, icy atmospherics of goth rock with the loud guitars and aggression of heavy metal, finding the middle ground between the two styles in a melodramatic sense of theater and lyrical obsessions with religion and gothic horror. Bands include Theatre of Tragedy, Lacrimosa, Tristania and Type O Negative.

Death metal -- An extreme style of metal with low-pitched guitars and growling, often incomprehensible vocals. Lyrical themes of early death metal often centered around gore horror (hence the term), although the genre has since diversified. Examples include Bolt Thrower, Suffocation, Sepultura, Death, Morbid Angel, Deicide and Entombed

Symphonic black metal -- has the same components as melodic black metal but a lot more orchestral pieces, mostly during the entire length of the song, mixed with the black metal element. This sub-genre of black metal has gained much criticism from black metal purists who argue that it is a watered down version of the real thing. The two albums which defined the sub-genre are generally agreed upon to be Cradle of Filth's Cruelty and the Beast and Emperor's In the Nightside Eclipse.
Symphonic black metal often can be confused with Norwegian gothic metal and there are some bands who are classified as both (Cradle of Filth or Summoning for instance).

Melodic death metal -- An offshoot of death metal, featuring melodic guitar riffs (sometimes acoustic), and in some examples occasional 'clean' singing. Death and Morbid Angel are primary influences of the genre, which has been developed further by predominately Swedish bands such as At The Gates, In Flames and Dark Tranquillity.

Thrash metal -- incorporated hardcore punk's speed with traditional metal. Slayer!, Overkill and early Metallica, Sepultura, Anthrax, Testament and Megadeth. As is true for many of the terms in this list, the moniker "thrash metal" was not always embraced by its supposed representatives; early on, Metallica referred to themselves as "power metal" (conflicting with the above definition of this term). Conversely, many more or less obscure bands, like Kreator, came up with equally obscure classifications for themselves, such as hate metal. Such labels were often soon forgotten or reused for something else.

Nu metal -- Features a pronounced hip hop influence, and guitar technique is often different from "traditional metal". It's widely argued that nu-metal is a misnomer, stating the genre has very little to do with heavy metal. See KoЯn, Papa Roach, Staind, Linkin Park, Slipknot, Drowning Pool, and Limp Bizkit.

Industrial metal -- features elements of dance music, techno, and heavy, distorted guitars. Synthesizers and drum machines are heavily used in this sub-genre. This style was created by Godflesh. Well known industrial metal acts include Rammstein, Samael, White Zombie, Fear Factory and The Kovenant.

Other than those above... i listen to something light as well...

J-pop -- an abbreviation of Japanese pop. It refers to Western-influenced Japanese popular music. The term J-pop was coined by J-Wave, an FM radio station, to denote what was once called "New Music." The term is widely used in Japan to describe many different musical genres including pop, rock, dance, rap, and soul. In the Nagoya area the term Z-pop is used to describe songs popular in the region. J-rock, Visual Kei and J-rap are generally considered to fall under the J-pop umbrella as well. Singers of J-pop include both popular musicians and seiyū.

K-pop -- an abbreviation for Korean pop. The term refers to Korean popular music, specifically South Korean popular music (there is practically no popular music industry in North Korea).
Korea has its own pop industry with native singers. Many of the Korean pop stars and pop groups are well known in East Asia and other parts of Asia. K-pop often emulates American pop music, and usually features young, sexy performers. It is a highly profitable industry, and in 2004, the 17 year old singer
BoA earned a US $9 million gross profit for her recording company in a single tour. Her salary alone exceeds a million a year.



Some other things i found in Wikipedia:

1.
Utada Hikaru's first album, First Love 1 7,648,000 copies sold (worldwide: 10,000,000 copies sold) (Holds record for most copies of an album sold in Japanese history)

2.
Ai Otsuka's first single, Momo no Hanabira (桃ノ花ビラ, Peach Flowerpetals) - #24 45,000 copies sold



My Conclusion:
I can't live without music!!


25.11.05

140# Verbal Egocentric Slaughter

140# Verbal Egocentric Slaughter

I got these two old friends.

But somehow when time goes by, i started to get some problems from them. More accurately, from their attitudes. I am despised for certain reasons by them. And i do not think that the reasons are reasonable. So, that's no reason for them to treat me in such a way.

I was said to be immature, just because i acted funny to make them laugh. If i did not fuckin' create jokes for the group to laugh with, so what the fuck should we do? Sometimes we do need to have a joker in a group. And i was one of it. In order to make the group to be more happening, i talked jokes, though it was lame. And i was fuckin' critiqued by those two people. Called me to fuckin' grow up. So, grew up people like them never need jokes? One who jokes is fuckin' treaten as a lame kid? Alright, i just don't fuckin' understand that.

I liked to wear black t-shirts, with KoRn, or Slipknot's picture. And i was said as a person who has no taste at all in fashion. Fuck that shirt. Why could not i wear as casual as i could to attend tuition classes? Did i fuckin' need to wear in formal with neck tie when i went for tuition? Did they ever wear those showed in Paris's fashion show to tuition?

They fuckin' critiqued my hair styles. Because i did not spike it up like what people can see in Dragon Ball. Because the definition of "Good Hairstyle" must be fuckin' spiked. Because that definition states that guys cannot have long hair. Because i'm having fuckin' bad hair quality which inherited. Because i never fuckin' bother much about hair fashions. So i was said to have a fuckin' bad hairstyles.

They fuckin' critiqued my physical appearance. Having a friend of 1.89m is a fuckin' insult for them. I was called to eat more because i am fuckin' thin. I was called as a fuckin bamboo stick because of the DNA coded in me.

They fuckin' critiqued my music because i do not listen to mainstreams. What the heck is wrong if i prefer underground music? Mainstream music is called as music, then non-mainstream ones are not? I cannot listen to what i like, but i must listen to what the public like?

They fuckin' critiqued me because i read comic. Comic is something fuckin' childish for them. Those who fuckin' read comic are not grown up. Naruto, King of Fighters are damn fuckin' childish for them. So is porn comic considered as childish? You fuckin' shits.

Do you fuckin' think that i like to be this tall and this thin? Is it that bad to have a such ordinary face? Why must you always make fun of my height, size and my face? Because i do not have Jerry Yan's figure and Leehom's face, so i'm fated to be insulted by you all? Why must you all fuckin' treat me in such a way?

Had you ever call someone fat as "You Fuckin' Big Ass, go back home to keep fit please"?. Or had you ever call someone flat "Please go get plastic surgery to get an F cup please"?

Do you think that i can grow reversed from 1.89m to 1.80m? Do you think that building a strong figure can be done within one fuckin' night? Do you think that a person can go fuckin' reversed from their inherited gene? Then you got to grow 0.2m from you fuckin current height, and lose 20% of your fuckin' weight.

Do you think that you are really that fuckin' pretty? Just because so many guys go after you? Are your outlooks everything?

Before you could say a fuckin' word to comment people's look, please, take a look into the mirror at first. Both of you are not that good as you could imagine.

If i'm really that fuckin' bad for you two, please, just forget me as your fuckin' friend. I do not deserve to be your friend. Because i'm not rich, not brilliant, not handsome, not strong for you two.

Sluts.

22.11.05

139# Leave me alone

139# Leave me alone

She sms-ed me again. Asked how i did for my interview. A rough answer i replied. And hoped she won't sms me anymore. But who knows she was asking me out for mamak and movie.

Yesterday when i was trying to sleep early, around 1am she sms-ed me. Said that she got something important wanted to tell me, long time ago. She did not dare to ask me until she got her courage.

I replied that i need to sleep as i had interview on the next morning. It was predictable that she would wish me good luck. But other than that, she kissed me goodight.

What the heck was wrong? What was she doing the things that she did 20 months ago?


I did not reply her anything after that, and tried to sleep. Somehow i could not because numbers of questions appeared in my mind.

What had happened to her? Did she separated with her boy friend? Why was she sort of like "seducing" me? Is she wanting me back now? But she was the one who got dumped... Damn. I just could not sleep at night before 4am.

I woke up at 6am because someone was sending good luck for me. (You know who you are) It was too early to greet me, i was still sleeping and i got woken up by that sms!

She asked me out. I told my elder sister about it. My sister doesn't like her. She said that we belong to two different world. My sister prefer "someone" else to be with me instead. Though she had just met that "someone" once.

And my mum called me not to see her anymore so that she won't have any expectation on me. Alright... I'm not encouraged to see her at all.

I replied her, saying that i can't go mamak at night since i'm online, blogger at night. Who needs to stay with the computer from 8 to 12pm. And i do not have time for movies... Even though before that i said that i'm free before December. I was contradicting myself.

Sometime we just need to get something covered up. Although i do not like to be a fake, anyway.

I do not know what had happened to her. If it was that bastard who dumped her, he is going to get something hot from me then damn it.


Leave me alone. I need a break.

138# Kinokuniya-sing feat. Tower Sux

138# Kinokuniya-sing feat. Tower Sux

After my interview, from IMU i took STAR and PUTRA lrt to the KLCC. An hour of trip, that was really tiring man.

Took a fast lunch at the Asean Favourite, went to Kinokuniya to find books that i wanted.

Gospel of Filth : The Black Metal Bible

I tried to search for it under a few catagories, could not see any books which look like it at all. Damn Msia ban this ban that. Or UK doesn't even export that "filthy" book to Msia?

When i was too desperated, i walked to the music section. I was like, omg... So many official score books over there. Marilyn Manson, Metallica also got. Tried to search for Cradle of Filth... Don't have also. Seems that i can't find any "filth" related books in our country...

I saw IOWA, Slipknot. Damn! And the Vol 3: The Subliminal Verses caught my sight. Yes man, i fould Slipknot Third Album's guitar score book! US 19.95, RM76.06... Oh shit... why is it so expensive. But i bought it anyway. (Most tracks are played in Drop B tuning, B-F#-B-E-G#-C#, and capo II D-A-D-G-B-D-, so how am i going to play in Standard E-A-D-G-B-E man...)

Went to the japanese section of the bookstore, which hidden somewhere at the children section of ISETAN. Photography section. Jis!! Japan girls photobook! Almost all of them i know! Spotted BoA's naturelle, RM138.85 - 2950yen (converted RM90.77)... Holly Shiet. It was just a photobook, why does it costs so high?

Ok... find for the others. Mika Nakashima's DIO, RM100.70 - 1950yen (converted RM60.00). What? That photobook is so small also costs 2 CD price? And i found a few of Itou Misaki. Still too expensive to buy...

Ai Otsuka's Love Jam piano score book. Less than 0.5cm of thickness and that score book is RM70.90 - 1050 yen (converted RM32.30). What the heck la... Just plain papers with notes and lines on it, RM70.90? Ok, it's copyrighted and we are paying for the hardwork of the pianist, Ai Otsuka herself as well. But it was still too much la...

Finally came out from the section empty handed. Too much to buy, too little i had. Well, it's not worthy to buy photobooks. Buying CDs is more worthy.

From one end i walked to the other end of KLCC for Tower Records. One of the two of music stores in KLCC. I was kind of lost that time.

Tower sucks. Really sucks. The price of a CD which i bought at Fantasy, Pyramid, RM34.90, it's costed at Towers for RM51.90. See! And Mika's single one for RM49.90. It's just a single, usually 1050yen (Rm32.31). And jap's living cost is higher. Therefore there is no way that Towers costs a single for RM49.90. Even more expensive than an album! Singles got 4 tracks only usually. One original track, one B-side, and two instrumental/remixed tracks. Rm49.90 for those is too much right?

I did not walk out empty handed from Towers this time. Spotted a movie starred by Mika Nakashima. Grabbed it. Too desperated and i needed to carry something out of the shop.

Though they import a lot of Japanese/Korean CDs and singles from Taiwan, but they cost those too high. Tower sucks. I really mean it.

Disclaimer: This is not an advertisement - Fantasy at Sunway Pyramid costs lower, got student discount some more! Rm4 for each CD!

137# The Interview

137# The Interview

Ok, I screwed it. I already knew that i would not speak as fluent as i wanted. But that's how it would be for a person like me, who only began to speak in English since last year. I've tried all my best. I know i did not give the professor and the doctor a good image about myself, because i really have problems in expressing myself.

When i asked to talk about myself, i told about stories which i'm a left-handed. My passion towards drawing, guitars and music. And difficulty that a left-handed and a 1.9m face. Height does cause a lot of problem during taking the public transports... And things like that as my introduction...

I had mentioned that my english level was low and i'm trying my best to improve. But i afraid that they would misunderstand, that i can't catch up studies which are conducted in english. The professor emphasised that the course is conducted in english. Of cause i know. I replied that i will not have problem in language anymore. Just try to make them believe that i can handle the course.

Overall i failed to convince them about my passion towards the medical field. They already expect that i would be nervous, i guess. Therefore hope they can give a little bit mercy in their recommendations during their final discussion in choosing new students.

When i was on the way to the admin office, i saw someone who looked like Aster. I stared as to confirm. Unfortunately i was wrong. Hope that girl would not think that i was a freak or something.

Met Kong Fui, Sien Loong and 2 of their friends fro Taylors. Li Ying, Timothy, Karanbir, Li Shan, Fleur... They are all in IMU now. According to karanbir, 20% of their intake are from Taylors. Or more accurately, from A level Jan 04 intake. Other than those mentioned, there are Shafiq, Kevin and lots of them who are studying in IMU now. How wish i could be in that intake with all of them. Anyway, now i wish to be their Junior at next year.

Li Ying said most of the people who got interviewed will be passed. And someone with BBC did passed too. I think those are different than my case. Mine is a special case where the candidate has weak english and could not speak fluently. Oh God, hope that i can pass.

19.11.05

136# A.S.A.P.

136# A.S.A.P.

Now days we have a lot of short forms to be used in our daily life. Either we use it for conversations, chatting in msn or typing informal stuffs. Now our lesson today is to take a look to the short forms that we usually come across in our life.

Let's begin with those formal ones.

A.S.A.P. - As soon as possible. I learnt it from Utada Hikaru's Deep River album.
A.K.A. - Also Known As
F.Y.I. - For your information
E.T.D. - Estimated time of departure
A.B.C. - Ais Batu Campur? American (African/Afghanistan) Born Chinese...
G.T.G. - Got to go
S.I.C. - Stay in contact
S.O.S. - Save Our Soul/Ship/Shit

Medical terms.
D.N.A. - Deoxyribonucleic acid (Defense Nuclear Agency)
H.I.V. - Human immune virus
A.I.D.S. - Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome
S.A.R.S.- Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome
C.H.D. - Coronary Heart Diseases
C.O.P.D. - Coronary Obstructive Pulmonary Diseases
T.B. - Tuberculosis
I.C.U - Intensive Care unit
A.&.E. - Accident and Emergency Department

Organisations
F.B.I - Food Business institute or Federal Bureau of Investigation...?
C.I.A - Cash in Advance or Central Intelligence Agency...?
N.Y.P.D. - New York Police Department
W.H.O. - World Health Organisation

Y.M.C.A. - Youth .... Association?
C.S.I. - Crime Scene Investigation
M.C.A. - Malaysia Chinese Association
M.I.C. - Malaysia Indian C...?
P.U.K.I.M.A. - Persatuan Untuk Kaum India Malaysia ??

Mechanicals
D.O.H.C. - Double over head cam
V.V.T. - Variable Valve Timing
D.V.V.T. - Double variable valve timing?
A.B.S. - Air Brake System? Antilock brake system?
S.L.K. - Joshua's dad Steven Leng Kiat? Small Little Kancil...
C.L.K - Joshua's dad Chow Leng Kiat? Cun Little Kancil... (you thought i'm talking about Benz ar?)

Schools, Institues and Universities
R.Z. - Raja Zarina
S.T.A.R. - Sekolah Tunku Abdul Rahman
S.T.A.J. - Sekolah Tunku Adul Jemaah
D.H. - Dato Hamsup/Hamzah
M.G.S. - Methodist Girl school a.k.a. Monkey Girl School
A.C.S. - Anglo Chinese School a.k.a. All Criminal School, Anjing/Agung Curi Spender
H.S.K. - High School Klang
S.T.K. - Sekolah Tinggi Klang, same as H.S.K, a.k.a Sekolah Tepi Kubur. Thegraveyard's really just beside the school.
K.J. - Kajang? Kampung Jawa la! Fucking INfamous school.

U.T.A.R. - University of Tunku Abdul Rahman
U.C.S.I - University College Sedaya International
K.U.P.T.M. - Kolej Universiti Pengurusan Teknologi Malaysia (Bet you don't know this)
I.M.U. - International Medical University, I Meet You
R.M.I.T. - Royal Melbourne Institute of Technology (correct ah?)
M.U. - Malaysia University? Fuck it la, Manchester University!!
L.S.E. - London School of Entertainment? Economics la.

Shopping malls
1.U. - One Utama
K.L.C.C. - Kuala Lumpur C..(?).. Centre.
S.P. - Sunway Pyramid
M.V. _ Mid Valley
J.J. - Jaya Jusco
K.P. - Klang Parade

Makans
K.F.C. - Don't say you dunno ok?
M.C.D. - Don't fucking say you dunno ok?
A.&.W. - Ok, I fucking dunno.

Fouls
W.T.H. - What the heck
W.T.F. - What the fuck
F.F.K. - Fong Feng Gei
T.F.K. - Well, ... Fei Gei... You should know.
L.M.A.O. - Laughing my ass out
S.O.B. - Son of a bitch
O.M.F.G. - Oh My Freaking/F... God.
K.N.N. - Kanina

K.N.B. _ Kanimbu
C.C.B. - Chow... mmm
C.B.K. - ... Kia la. Ask Katak, he taught me one.
K.N.N.B.E.C.C.B. - Mmm... Too long to tell.

Geeks
C.C. - Cyber Cafe
C.S. - Counter Strike
R.O. - Ragnorok Online
D.O.T.A. - Defend of the accients
D.O.A. - Dead or Alive
K.O.F. - King of Fighters
C.P.U - Center Processer Unit
H.D.D. - Hard Disk Drive
R.A.M. - Random Access Memory
R.O.M. - I forget liao... tell me.
U.S.B. - Universal Seriel Bus
P.D.A. - Personal Digital Assistant
S.M.S. - Short Message Service
E.M.S. - Enhanced Messaging Service
M.M.S. - Multimedia Messaging Service
X.M.S. - Expression Message Service (Alah.. Digi main glamme je)
G.P.R.S. - Global Paging R... System...
E.D.G.E. - Enhanced Data Global Evolution

E.T.C. - Esceteras
T.K.S. - Thinking (s)kills
A.D.I.D.A.S. - All Day I Dream About Sex. From Korn's Life is Peachy album, 1996.
S.M. - Latin Scientiae Magister, Master of Science. You thought Sadomasochism ar?

O.L. - Office Lady
C.E.O. - Chief Executive Officer
L.O.V.E. - Lacking of Visual Entertainments.
U.S.A. - United States of America / U Su Ann / Udang Sotong Ayam
S.A.M. - South Australia Matriculation / Saya Anak Malaysia

B.B.K. - Bandar Baru Klang or Big Black Kock
T.T.K. - Ting Tai Ken. Opps..! Skip this
M.F.K.R. - Mate Feed Kill Repeat, Not Motherfucker la.
B.S.B. - Back/Black-Streat/Shit Boys
L.M.F. - Lazy Muthafuckas... HongKong group memang... sigh.
F.I.R. - Faye + Irwin + Real
S.H.E. - Seline + Hebe + Ella
M.V.A. - Music Video Award? Hell no, Vivien + Adrien + Mike! Wahaha...!

Alright boys and girls. Take note and remember all the short forms we learn today. Make things A.S.A.P. - As Short As Possible!

17.11.05

135# Things i like about my country (Rare trial version)

135# Things i like about my country (Rare trial version)

The Food


Of cause, who doesn't? Where else can we find such a great variety of food outside Malaysia? You guys who are in UK sure can't avoid from eating the same thing again and again. And miss malaysia's foods in the end don't you?

Malay food, indian food, chinese food, fast food, slow food, healthy food, unhealthy food, junk food, rubbish food...etc, you name it. The good thing in Malaysia is that we can eat different kind of foods.

For example, we can eat malay food on Monday,indian food on Tuesday, Chinese food on Wednesday, Thai food on Thursday, Mamak food on Friday, Fast food on Saturday and everything on Sunday.

I talk cock only la, i eat chinese food mostly.

But look, the greatest point is, although Malaysia has high variety of food. But number of obese we have compared to fast food countries is still low. If you go US, UK, sure you can see there're lots of fat asses.

The Geography


Strategically posited at the malacca strait! Ok, this is not important. What meant for business is that we have Sumantera as our semi-ultimate shield. Sheilding effect provided from the Sumantera causes the peninsula of Msia free from Tsunami which attack from the south west or west. Anyway this is not a good point to stay safe by sacrificing the living kinds (got ah?)in Sumantera...

A mountain range at the centre of the peninsula (i can't recall what the damn name is) protects the west from storm and monsoon wind. Thus the west experiences less affects from those weathers.

Ok, these are god given and it do not related to Malaysia's achievements, forget about it.

The Peace


Our country considered peaceful if compared to those terrorised countries. People over here are not brainwashed YET to set bomb everywhere. People over here are not as pariah as those in indo, who slay, rape, rob, snatch, grab the fairer ones in their damned country. But i cannot guarantee shit that these shits won't happen over there, though i prayed for it not to happen.

At least curry and BKT over here are still able to tolerant with nasi lemak. But deep inside the nasi lemak hate those two mentioned til the end, even though those two are make used to develop the nasi lemak land. They have never appreciate it anyway.

Alright, this is not a point either.

The Conclusion


So, what i like is just the food! The others are still unacceptable from certain aspects. Malaysia still need to realise how paradox they are. How long they need to hide their head into the hole, just to avoid from the fact that the others are actually better than them?

All those fucking unfairness, privileges and the so-called faith, doctrine are actually obstacles which slow the country from moving on. Wake up and face to the reality damn it!

14.11.05

134# Very Idiotic Person

134# Very Idiotic Person

Some of you all may wonder who is the person that i mentioned in the fiftieth of my hatred list. Well, I shall tell the story about that person here.

This guy, Kelvin was my primary school mate. Where we used to be very close to each other until standard 6. We studied at different secondary school after that. But somehow we managed to meet each other again in the tuition centre at the years of Form 4 and Form 5.

I had no friends when i was taking tuition at that tuition centre at the early stage. So i was close to this guy during classes. I understand a lot about him. I can't deny that he is intelligent, but at the same time he has a lot of defects in him. He has no manners at all, though i was used to it.

At the year of Form 5, i began to get close with the other guy called Youth. Then i did not mix with Kelvin anymore. Because i knew that Youth's attitude and everything is so far better than him. Youth and me were very close during that year, and we always hung with the girls from the girls school.

The problem started when the girls began to complain with me there were few guys who harrassed them on the phone. Either playing miss calls, or verbally sexual harassed them on the phone. And the girls asked me for help, since i was kind of punk at that time and they expected me to fight against those people.

Remember once a girl gave me the number which disturbed her for quite sometime. I recorded the number in my cell phone. I called, then i began to have verbal fight over the phone. Told them no to disturb and sexually harass my friend anymore. The person over the phone was like did not know what was happening.

In the end, i found out that the person i called was one of the friend of Kelvin. Since the same number i saved in my phone with two different names, thus no name appeared in my phone. I did not know the one i scolded to was a very good guy, who was in Kelvin's group.

He explained that he did not do that to the girl, it was Kelvin who used his phone to do all of the stuffs. Alright, and then i warned him not to give his phone to that idiot to do such a thing to my friends anymore.

Another one, where my pet sister complaint to me that a guy always called her and wanted to meet her. She felt very disturbed and uneasy with those calls. The person over the phone claimed that he was Kelvin's cousin. My pet sister knows Kelvin as well. Thus she called me to tell Kelvin, so that his cousin stop disturbing her.

Kelvin said he did not recognise such a number and he did not have such a cousin. And he called me to find out who was that guy, at the same time he will. Fine, i knew he was fucking lying to me because he is that kind of masked liar.

Days after, he met me in the tuition centre and asked me whether i found out the identity of that person or not. I did not. He said the word "Fai Cai" to me, which means "useless wood". It was so damn insulting. He was the one who caused the problem and he scolded me instead. I was so damn pissed. Imagine that time i was in Form 5 i could not handle my temper correctly with my low EQ. If the girls were not there then i sure will smash that s.o.b.'s head onto the glasses on the wall.

Since that incident, i have never talk to that low class pervert. And the girls were still disturbed by those unknown people. I had enough of scolding idiots over the phone and to have a kill list in my phone. More than 15 numbers i used to have in my phone who gave from the girls. All of them are either from Kelvin, or people from his group.

That s.o.b. was from a guy school, SMK Dato Hamzah, or Datuk Hamsup literally. They have never see a girl before in their school, caused them to be chemically and mentally imbalanced, thus sexually harass my female friends.

The one i hate the most is that s.o.b. He is just the most brilliant people among those bunch of "Ah Beng" in his group. He always think that he is the best among all. In fact, his group is just a damn fucking low class people. Just that he is the best among them, then he never respect the others. Being a top "Ah Beng" seems to be a proud for him. If he is given a chance to see the world, then he shall know how tiny and useless he is in fact.

The last time i met him was in ACS school's canteen day. Where my ex-secondary schoolmates are for Form 6. He was there to for the programme. I saw him and i did not expect he would be transffered to that school as well. Luckily i was studying in Taylors college, or else i would be transffered to ACS and need to face that s.o.b. all times.

When i saw him, i nodded and smiled at him. But that s.o.b. did not even do the same to me. Instead he turned away and did like he had never notice me. What the fuck? He was the one who is wrong and caused me to angry with him. Then when we met again, i was already so gentleman who nodded at him. He did not even appreaciate at all. Fuck!

Now i'm still fucking hate him. Everytime i will imagine how i would like to torture him. To reverse crucify him in my room, slit his wrists. Cut him at his stomach, roll out his intestine slowly. Carve at his face, stuff his fithy mouth with needles and sew it. Burn his skin with candles. Put out all his fingernails. And then kick at his face endlessly. Let him suffer to death. And the torment must go on as long as possible before he dies.

My hatred will not be extinguished. But as a guy, if one day we could sit down and settle all the problems. I can surely forgive him and be friend to him again. The thing is that i will not have a chance to do it since he treats friends like animal, and he will not sit down to talk with me.

I shall not kill him by myself. God sees all his sins. In his life, after he enters to the social, he will understand that they way the treats the others is not right. And he will suffer the consequences. No one likes his attitude, he will ends up to have no job, no money, no women. And then he will die alone. Satan will then take over him, and his torments continue in Hell.

Curse is better than actions. Actions need to be responsible for laws. But i can curse everything i like. Though cursing is a sin too, but my curses are rational and reasonable. I believe that other than me, there are still lots of them outside who hate him. Either they will take action to gang bang him up, or some will curse him like me until his rest of his life.

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