51# In mourning by Her side
"In an age crucified by the nails of faith,
When rank scarecrows of his blighted lands..."
Against all expectations, no....
I couldnt accept the fact when i found out tat everything goes reversed.
We are in the 2 different pole, just bcoz of the difference of faith.
This tiny line really makes a very huge difference between the up and down.
I'm not in opposition to anything now... I cant even say a word...
Bcoz i see things differently from the others...
This is a very big obstacle for me to get someone close.
I do lost something due to my problem.
And i cant gain anything bcoz i'm different.
Why must i be the one to be blamed?
Why the Hell on earth I will become like this?
Everything is my fault.
If i never touch "it" last year, i wont ended up be so heretical.
But maybe without it, i cant accept either.
I dunno what to do, I'll try to avoid things like tat.
Next time... if happens...
I shall clear everything first b4 i came to the conclusion.
I'm not willing to be so stupid, i cant control it.
Forget about Her, clear my mind again...